I’d like to think this whole ordeal started by teaching my parents what a ‘lazy bum’ was.
The term grew on them so much that it’s been my unofficial nickname for the summer–jokingly, of course. This led to a discussion of a blog and how one such lazy bum, and many in my similar situation, spend this particular summer. Like any writer, I spent a lot of time brainstorming the serious unseriousness of a catchy title to gain motivation and a general outline. This led to the idea of ‘wastrel summer’ and from there ‘How to Successfully Wastrelmaxx’.
As I began typing up my first draft, I had a dilemma; everything I talked about was the opposite of being a wastrel!
You see, the best time of your life will not be in your twenties, being young, wild, and free, or as a kid with childhood innocence, but rather the summer before you head off to college. A solid three-ish months of having very few demands before the harsh reality of corporate demands and adulthood hits you as you take on college.
With this, you’ll take it upon yourself to do everything but stay home and do nothing. The only wastrel part of this is spending money and gas on going places and doing things with your friends, especially if you’re like me and have no job. (Ultimate bum behavior I know.)
This is the summer of bittersweet memories and ultimate freedom as you try to cram in dozens of hangouts with your friends every day and hour. After 9 months of counting down the days towards graduation, you’ve got nothing to do. Absolutely nothing. There’s no annoying inner voice in your ear nudging you to wake up and prepare for an APUSH LEQ or finish the Biomed research paper haunting your computer.
There’s an unlimited number of opportunities awaiting. Grad party hopping bleeds into summer party hopping; late-evening poolside hangouts complete with pasta bowl runs; karaoke sprees at the Asian Plaza while grabbing KBBQ; binging the latest movie releases post-Six Flags; the agenda is packed. With no fear of a surprise test on Monday or even an early curfew–and as we are now big kids with licenses and jobs–the hours can stretch from late afternoon to early night.
The only time you’re pulled from this stupor is when you have orientation; notably, it is the most serious thing you truly need to prepare for or even be nervous about all summer. For weeks before your visit, your inbox is absolutely swamped with emails and a multitude of links about registration and campus resources. And if you’re an unlucky STEM major like myself, you’ll have the pleasure of facing the dreaded math or science assessment.
Apart from the great hell that is registration, as everyone battles for choosing courses in no more than five minutes or so, you find yourself coming home with burnt orange coursing through your veins (if you’re a Longhorn!), very pleased with your future four years and possibly slightly peeved at your academic advisor.
After that, you truly have no other worries, as you can continue dilly-dallying for the rest of the summer as before!
Okay, I lied.
There is a singular, looming threat to our ‘wastrel’ summer that you can’t ignore forever. With the prospect of spending most of your time–and gas money–on outings, you actually need a job. If still unemployed, at least you’re still productive in searching for local and even future on- and near-campus jobs.
So truly, how can it be a wastrel summer when you spend it doing everything but being idle and unachieving?
After twelve tedious years of working tirelessly, what harm is there in basking in the sweet success of labor we have finally achieved? Yes, to your parents it can be a ‘wastrel’ summer of doing nothing productive as opposed to the previous years, but this is the summer of pure relaxation, regeneration, and reconnaissance!
And that is exactly why I had to scrap my original title. This isn’t a guide on how to be a lazy bum; it’s a testament– this is ‘How to Successfully Fail at Wastrelmaxxing.”
